I Can Change: It’s Not Impossible For The Left-Side Brain

The world is in a state of turmoil and chaos. We are all confused about what is up and what is down. We don’t know what is right or what is wrong. What is our next move?

A lot of people don’t seem to understand my connection to the Jews. I am ultra-spiritual but why do I love ultra-religious? We have to understand that this place that we call planet Earth is a playground. God set this up for you and me to have fun in. Granted, we all are not having much fun these days with the mass of confusion all around us but, trust me, we are coming to a place where it all will make sense.

I speak from experience. All this craziness outside of me used to be inside of me. Everything is a reflection of who we are. This game is about the individual (self) and God. The self is Adam, who was split into two but is really one. The story of Adam is there to help us to try to identify with perfection. Adam is perfect, He is life, He is the image of God. We don’t worship our human image, which is physicality, which is the hardest thing for man to do. It is our nature to trust physicality, but our truth is spirituality.

Somehow, we need to identify with what is spiritual because that is who we REALLY are.

When I was younger, a child, I grew up in a home with very strict rules. My father, a perfectionist, had expectations that I could never achieve, although I tried very hard to as it was always my desire to receive his acceptance if I could. But I always failed. Eventually, I lost hope in myself. I was never good enough. That is when I became very rebellious about rules and didn’t want them anymore.

I became reckless. I was extreme and did not care about consequence. I just wanted to have fun.

My story ended me up in a very confusing place, much like the place I can see humanity is in now. I see we all are feeling the same way. We have been oppressed by our religions that have brought us up with a belief that we trusted. More and more we are seeing how religion told us things that we needed to do but now they don’t make sense. Religion lied to us and manipulated us in many ways. As much as religion tried to teach us what is good, as it turns out, we mostly see how it was bad.

Most of us became rebellious against religion and many of us don’t even believe in God anymore.

A Rock and a Hard Place

I know the things I say make sense but I speak to a very small crowd. We want pleasure and we want things fast. We don’t want the aggravation of confronting truth and the truth about ourselves. We all failed the program because the program is impossible to keep. It is the program that we have to ditch who has been keeping us imprisoned from our true self.

We cannot be afraid to trust God.

When I became suicidal, I realized that rules were good. I was so reckless that I could have died many times because of the crazy stunts I was doing. As a young girl, so often I woke up in places that I hadn’t even understood how I had gotten there. With how easy it is for young girls to be taken advantage of, it is amazing that I have survived.

I had deep wounds that needed healing. My story of my struggle with mental health is deep. It is unbelievable to me that I am now a writer and became a nurse. Communication was the hardest thing for me. I had no idea who I was. I also was told by PhD’s, parents, and teachers that I would never amount to anything. They wanted to send me to special Ed. They told me that my brain was dysfunctional. They said I needed meds to be able to function. I repeated grades. I was always failing.

My reaction to life was it’s reaction to me.

I had no confidence. I got that from God. I started reading the Bible thinking that I would never understand it. My trust in the system failed. I just wanted to know it for myself.

Have you ever read the Bible? I think it is good to read it as “the church” picks and chooses how it wants to use scripture to manipulate with.

These higher ups have told us that we are stupid and we need to trust them because they are so much smarter than us. But in a time of information and with as free as it all is, now, we all can know the real truth.

So, why my fascination with Jews?

I found freedom and now I want to go back to the box?

This is why I am between a rock and a hard place. The spirituality of us all is the feminine, right-side brain who has been oppressed by her masculine, left-side brain all this time. The left-side of our brain is our analytical side that needs reason and physical proof to trust something. It understands that 1+1=2 and there is no other way to put it. It sees a path that is good and now there is no going off of that path.

The right-side of our brain is connected more to our heart. It likes to be free and creative to express how it wants to be. It does not like rules and intuitively recognizes what feels good, so must be good. It does not like to be confined to anything but always wants to create something new.

The self is our individual self but the self is also all of us. We are all a little bit more of this or that. We are all masculine and feminine having nothing to do with gender. The healing takes place by understanding who we are. Who we are is very deep because you can learn who the individual self is but then you need to understand who you are by what has influenced you the most — religion.

I see religion as our left-side brain.

This is my attraction to the Jew. The Jew is the left-side and the non-Jew is the right. Ultimately, we need a balance of both.

The more we heal the individual self, the more we heal the whole; meaning we need to discover who we are in truth by reflecting our truth (that we understand) to God’s truth in how He loves us ALL.

We are all one Adam and somehow we have to put Adam back together again by healing all our parts.

Healing is balancing both sides of the brain to work in tandem with one another, EQUALLY.

Then we will be healed because that is when we become ONE.

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