People are telling me that I need to write about what is relatable. I realize that when I am out in my day, being a nurse, I cannot talk to people about the deep things that are sitting in my heart. A normal conversation is only superficial when I have a quick encounter with someone.
The real reason for my blog though was not just for you, but it was for me because I had to release these inner, spiritual conflicts that I was not able to talk with anyone about. People around me typically would not understand or relate to my interests in Judaism and the Jewish people . I am hoping to connect to people who are also having the same spiritual struggles.
By now, you kinda know my story, and that I am in love with the Jew. I have been very curious about him since the very beginning of my journey.
Raised in a dark, oppressive home and being the eldest of my two sisters I identify with the Jew and their turmoil and responsibility. I identify with a father who had high expectations and impossible perfectionism. I understand consequence, judgment, and fear.
I was raised in a dark world, which stole my identity, which took me on the journey to learn who I am. At twenty-five, I fell in love with a Jew and there began my love story. I wanted to know everything about him as one would want to know everything about someone they are in love with. My love and fascination took me to the Jewish people and there I saw something amazingly special — This man I knew from a book was alive in these people.
I need to express my love for the Jew: The Jew is the other half of the Gentile. We are like a man and a woman who are courting each other. Like a man and a woman we are very similar, but yet, we are very different. We are beginning to see how we complement one another. We are beginning to understand that we love each other and we are falling in love.
We are like how it was in the beginning. Adam and Eve started our story. It is as if they exploded and populated the world. We needed a history of time to complete this sixth day, man’s day, to understand who we are and to know our true identity.
You are Jew, the man, and I am Gentile, the woman. We complement one another and we are beginning to understand our love, which is true love, which is the image of God.